Why I should Never Let My EMT Cert Lapse

Years (something like 5-6) ago, when I first became an EMT my first call was a fatality. I just got my cert finished (yes, I passed my computer test, go me) so, just to keep things tragically symmetrical, so was my first call as a RE-certed EMT. At first when we were toned to a "male, unresponsive, no pulse" I assumed the bystander just didnt know how to take a pulse. Happens ALL the time, and if he was RIGHT, we'd be doing about 45 minutes of CPR. Instead, upon arrival, it was clear that there was nothing we could do. The patient had been crushed by the weight of his stupid toy, and was beyond help.
That was bad enough when I thought he was an adult. It got WAY worse when I was informed that he was only a kid, not even a teenager. Just HUGE. And then the police notified his mother, who was just down the hillside, in her house. And the day got MUCH worse from there.
I've never been to a death notification at somebody's house, only been there incidentally in the ER, and by the time people make it into the ER after being told "there's been an accident", they're sort of prepared for it to not be good. This woman was COMPLETELY blindsided by the fact that her son, whom she'd just seen an hour before, was not coming home again.

I'm really not good at the "comfort the parents" part. My way of dealing with other people's grief is to feed them. Not an option here, so i was a bit out of my depth. RIP kid. Motorized toys for children are SO not a good idea.

Cervical Spine Traction

So I'm still here! Long time no blog! Tuesday I spent in VT, checking out a hospital that I might want to apply to next year when i'm All Growed Up. I spent 6 hours following a TERRIFIC nurse around the ER. Only by "following around" i mean "hanging out in the trauma room" because his patient in there was pretty much a full time job in and of itself. Middle aged man, status post motorcycle ditching. Estimated blood alcohol was probably about .35. Yeah. POINT THREE FIVE.

For comparison, if I, a small-ish sized female were to have a BAC that high, I'd probably be comatose. This dude went DRIVING. Briefly. He managed to smash up quite a few ribs, lacerating both liver and spleen, but that wasn't his main problem. The MAIN problem was that he dislocated his C-spine. Oh, but he still had viable use of all 4 limbs, and no urinary retention. Lucky bastard.

So it was TRACTION TIME! 15 x-rays and 155 lbs of traction pulling from bolts screwed into his skull (which is one of the COOLEST things I've EVER seen) he could feel everything, which didnt make him happy. Also, his vocabulary consisted mostly of explatives aimed at those of us "punishing him" by not letting him move to get more comfortable. As the Orthopod said "sir, if you even NOD you'll never see your penis again. HOLD STILL."

By the end of the shift we packed this prize human being off to the OR for a spinal fusion, and said goodbye to the cops, the patient's last comment still ringing in my ears- "Do you think this violates my parole?"

Take THAT Theology!

WOOHOOOOOO!!! Today I got an email from the Dean, saying that she was accepting (at long last) my previous medieval courses from my Anthro/Arch degree for BOTH my theology requirements. That means I dont have to over-load classes in the spring, just take the Developmental Psych class this fall. CAN I GET AN AMEN?

In other news, other than the self inflicted shotgun GSW to the head, things have been pretty quiet around here, patientwise. Which probably means everyone is saving up for the warmer weather that should descend soon.

Summer reminds all of us that "Live Free Or Die" would be better put "Live Free AND Die". Helmet laws? Please? Or mandatory health insurance/ DNR / Organ donor cards for people who wont wear a helmet?

This Summer's First Call: Hilarity Ensues

So last saturday I passed my practical! YAY ME! (only, i HAVE done all this before, so it was mostly nerves threatening to throw me off) Which means I got my pager and radio re-issued from the FAST squad (that's Volunteer EMT squad to all of you NOT in the Frozen Northlands). AAAAnd we got my first call of the summer 20 minutes later. While I was putting groceries away, naturally. I performed my USUAL "run to the car in a bra, pull on squad shirt en route" maneuver, which works as there are no neighbors, get to the ambulance, they pull away AS i'm closing the doors, (thanks Mike, I missed taking my life in my hands with your driving) and get to the call- "Male, LOC change, laceration to forehead" which turns out to be EPIC.

This young dood, 28 or so, was mowing his mom's lawn. He's not the brightest bulb in the kitchen, and he's holding the hood of the ride-on mower in place with bungee cords. Not in itself dangerous. Except he decides to CHECK them. While leaning nice and close. One particularly vindictive bungee jumped off, smacked him square between the eyes, and KNOCKED HIM OUT. He woke up, and called 911, because he didnt know how long he'd been out. Yes, his mother was standing right there, yes he IS a volunteer firefighter, but hey. Gotta get that nasty bungee-shaped welt checked.

And, in the process, let the ENTIRE FIRE DEPARTMENT KNOW YOU GOT KNOCKED OUT BY A BUNGEE CORD. Because let's face it- HIPPA doesn't mean ANYTHING in a town where everyone knows which addresses go with which people. We get toned out and EVERYONE in the entire REGION knows who's in trouble.

God i love being up here.

Unemployment Sucks

It really does. Still job-searching, but the Local Big Spiffy Medical Center is actually HIRING, so i applied for ALL their patient care positions. I'm overqualified, having a BA, but that's ok. I'll do pretty much anything.

In MEDICAL news, I've been down at the EMT squad a lot this week, preparing to test tomorrow and get my license back. (Let it expire while taking nursing prereqs- oops!) I LOVE living in a small town- excellent gossip. Last week was apparently an absolute nightmare. TONS of calls. And I learned that we have a New Local Batshit Crazy Dirtbag. LBCD is living in a falling apart-at-the-seams trailer which cannot be condemned, because of the state Live Freeze and Die attitude, which precludes condemnation for health reasons without a REDICULOUSLY long process. On the bright side, people dont lose their homes. On the downside, this "domicile" is being inhabited by 2 people (LCBD and wife) 2 dogs, a goat, and some chickens. None of whom apparently know how to use sanitary measures for their bathroom habits. So there's excrement EVERYWHERE, no electricity inside, and the whole structure is percariously perched on a hillside.

The net result of this is that EMS is PROHIBITED from entering, no matter HOW crazy he is when they call us. We stage down the hill, and FIRE has to go in IN FULL HAZMAT GEAR with breathing masks to get him out. Which they wont do, for fear that the hovel will tip over, and kill them. So we have to wait until he comes out. Ew. And the police are worried, because he's CRAYZEE. As in, we're currently trying to get him shipped off to the state hospital. The problem is, his wife (just as crazyee) keeps bailing him out and taking him home.

Good to be home.

Speed Record

Happy Memorial Day! As a result of it being the holiday weekend, nobody is calling back. Hrmph. Holding pattern until Tuesday.

Went up the mountain today, and set a personal best time- 36 minutes ascent time! Woot! Thats about 3 minutes faster than my previous best. Admittedly, I was wheezing audibly enough to worry pretty much everyone else on the mountain, but I sort of enjoy wheezing and STILL passing everyone. I figure that I'm in considerably more danger from TAKING my Albuterol than from my airways closing down on the mountain. If I SLIP on that mountain once I start shaking, I'm DEFINATELY going to get hurt. So i just drink water, put my arms over my head, and deal.

Good weather. Also cleaned the house, did 3 loads of laundry, and read a murder mystery.

Still Unemployed

Getting VERY bored, and beginning to go quietly insane. I vividly remember why I like living on my own. I'm about 2 days away from applying to work shifts as a waitress at my old restaurant. Tomorrow I'll be calling everyone again, and CROSSING FINGERS that somebody (anybody) with a hospital, or a clinic, or something will take me.

Surely SOMEONE needs a tech!