Today we had TWO patients, and i was paired with a different partner. This was ok...we differ on a lot of points of opinion, (she thinks vaccines are scary and evil, I love them) but we work okay together. One patient was a lovely man with lung cancer, admitted for a cardizem drip for new onset A-fib. He and his wife were REALLY with it, asked great questions, took notes on everything the docs said, so that when the NEXT service came by the docs didn't have to go over the same things again and again.
Our other patient wasn't nearly as easy. He weighed at least 250-300 pounds, and was paralyzed from the waist down, according to him. He could, however, feel everything down to the tips of his toes, and i'm not sure how much was paralysis, and how much was deconditioning due to bedrest and pure LAZINESS. Now, I'm a student. I like to give my patients the benefit of the doubt, but this man had two working arms. I know this, because he had the remote control in one hand, and the telephone in the other, and he was holding the phone up to his ear PERFECTLY, and clicking channels...and yet he continually asked to be spoon-fed, and to have his juice held gently to his lips while he sipped.
My answer was simple "oh sir, we're trying to encourage self-care behaviors! Can you please do these range of motion exercises for me? No, I will not wipe your chin for you. Here's a tissue".
And then the call light started going off, while I was helping do the med-pass for my other patient, who needed a blood draw. WHY was the call light going off you might ask?
He wanted his pillow fluffed. And then another DIFFERENT pillow. And then THAT one needed to be fluffed. I understand that patients get lonely. I understand that human contact is important. I am not a candy striper, and taking advantage of the fact that, as a student I HAVE to RUN to answer call lights is just a dick move. No points awarded, sir!
PS- I DID fluff the pillow, btw...I'm not irresponsible! (That and my instructor already wants to kill and eat me)